Ich bin ein [Texas-Born] Berliner

Culinary possibilities have enormously improved since I originally arrived in Munich (directly from two years in Paris yet) 56 years ago last fall. During my five Munich years my frustrated gourmet’s heart leapt up when the Guide Michelin itself, which I’ve sometimes thought of as perhaps the only incorruptible institution in la douce France, began publishing an annual Guide Michelin for Germany. Prior to that I’d regretfully concluded that only in England did one stand a greater chance of eating badly in an unrecommended restaurant chosen at random; after that, Michelin contributed importantly to many Germans’ revised attitude towards what I once saw referred to in a French publication as “les plaisirs de la table”. Because of all that I paid special attention to it when my email this morning brought me this morsel from Deutsche Welle, a kind of German equivalent of The Voice of America:

14.01.2008

German States Prepare to Do Battle over Dumplings

Two German states fighting over food?  It would be laughable if it didn’t happen every other month.  This time, Bavaria and Rhineland-Palatinate are getting all steamed up over a dumpling.

One of the best ways of celebrating your survival after completing a hair-raising descent of an icy Piste is to shed your skis or snowboard and get stuck into a Dampfnudel.  While literally translating as steamed noodle, it’s essentially a massive dumpling, served either in savo[u]ry or sweet form.  It can be the best way of reaffirming life after partaking of death-defying winter sports.  Combined with a bucketload of après-ski alcohol, the Dampfnudel makes everything good in the wintry world.

Such a culinary treat should be treasured, and the Dampfnudel is certainly championed as a fine example of German cuisine in the places where it is held most dear.  But, as with most things coveted by the many, it is fiercely defended by the few.

Instead of devouring the monstrous ball of dough with vigor – or with either mushrooms in white sauce or custard and jam, depending on your taste – the good people of Bavaria and Rhineland Palatinate are channeling their energies into slagging one another off over the origin of the Dampfnudel.

Arguments over food and drink are not a new thing in Germany.  Most recently, the Berliners have had to defend their Currywurst against covetous northerners while the people of Hesse almost came to blows with Brussels over their Apfelwein [a mildly alcohol potable made from apples].  So, apart from it all being rather petty and unseemly, what’s the deal with this new outbreak of culinary hostilities?

Bavarians stake claim on the Web

Well, as with most food fights it all stems from perceived ownership and the regional pride a particular food can instil.  The Bavarians have stolen a march on the Rhineland folk by proclaiming on the electronic oracle of all that is truthful (the Internet to the rest of us) that the Dampfnudel is a speciality of Bavaria.  The Rhinelanders fear that this will lead to their rivals to the south staking a claim for ownership of the dumpling at an EU level.

“We will not allow them to take the Dampfnudel without a fight,” proclaimed Rhineland-Palatinate’s Minister of Agriculture Hendrik Hering in a local newspaper article on the growing crisis.  He added that all judicial and diplomatic efforts would be employed in keeping the origin of the Dampfnudel associated with the Rhineland.

Rhinelanders expose rivals as culinary magpies

On first glance, the Rhinelanders may appear to be the antagonists here.  The Bavarians have done nothing other than stake a claim, rightly or wrongly, to something they believe to be theirs.  But on further investigation, it appears that Bavaria has form when it comes to snaffling other regions’ delicacies and calling them their own.

Glancing at the offending Internet site, “Food from Bavaria,” there are the obvious specialities from that most proud region of Germany: the veal sausage, Abensberger asparagus and Hefeweizen wheat-based beer among them.  But since when did Swabian Maultaschen, the oversized savoury-stuffed pillows from neighboring Baden-Württemberg, come from Bavaria?  How long have the Swabian Spätzle noodles been a Bavarian invention…?

Digging deeper, one can see that maybe the Rhineland has a point…

DW staff (nda)

DW staff (nda) | www.dw-world.de | © Deutsche Welle.

{And it will surprise nobody who knows me personally that I’ve gussied up these native-born Goddam Krauts’ Englisch before passing this tidbit along to you….}